Day 168

10AM:

This morning my wife sent me a text that might have been construed as showing a lack of understanding.  Nothing huge by any means, just a mistake of days (presentation today instead of tomorrow).  I’m sure it brought up the same questioning in her as it did in me though = lack of awareness?  What I’m finding is that she is still at the stage that I need to stop her from getting derailed from this stuff.  I’m okay with that as long as it follows the “gradual release of responsibility” model and not the “crutch” model.  She believes that it won’t be a crutch, but it is still tough for me to get hurt and then have to feel worse because she doesn’t cope with it well.  She will again.  She will hold it again.  She is strong and loving and capable and beautiful and all mine.

This is for her:

Make me trust again whole-heartedly, not just believe.  Give me evidence for my belief, enough that it washes off the cobwebs.  Don’t complain about the scratches, just polish the rest to a shine incomparable.

And never stop believing

And never stop having faith

And never think that we are not us along the way

But understand that we shall get there someday

Keep trying to fly my love

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