There is a dream – a dream that veganism is the silver bullet, but not in the way that I expected. Not in the way that the freedom of veganism – in terms of calories – will allow me to eat whatever I want and not gain weight, to not lose muscle mass, to not lose control of my “daily caloric intake.” This silver bullet is more complex.
I love animals. I hate that a being compassionate enough to demonstrate unconditional love (since humans are full of conditions) get killed for our benefit. Popular thinking or not, there are more humans that I dislike than animals. I feel worse about losing my temper with animals than humans. Humans have the cognizance to decide, animals do not appear to have the same ability. I have always felt this and after reading what I’ve read (Eating Animals) and watching what I’ve watched (Forks Over Knives), the treatment of animals needs to change. We treat animals – beings with the ability to love unconditionally – like commodities. That is wrong, to me.
I have felt unable to veer into this world due to my history of disordered eating. On the surface, a recovering orthorexic should not get into a system of restrictive eating (as veganism is, like it or not).
I will frame it as such: veganism, for me, is an indication that I have the strength/courage to change what I can and the wisdom/respect to know what I cannot. I want to do good. I want to good for animals. I want to be able to say that despite my eating disorder history and tendencies, I will be (no, am!) able to say: “my blackness wants me to restrict the amount of veggies I have on that sub sandwich over my desire to save the animals.”
That’s what I mean about the silver bullet. The thoughts of transitioning to veganism stem from my heart, rather than my blackness.
Veganism = my heart.
My heart = love.
Love = silver bullet.
Silver bullet = veganism.
And as we have visited in the past, love is never wrong.